the writer Hi, my name is AJ Junior. Just AJ will do. I am a skinny individual with the heart of a lion and wittines of a mouse. I have THE most loving fiancee EVER! I love making friends, so why not facebook me and be my friend. =) current play Class 95FM sellout gossips ![]() dearest beloved friends archives September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 today's visits |
Friday, February 26, 2010 @ 11:55 PM
Blogger . Lover's Choice . Generation There is a million and one thing on my mind currently, but it seems to me that I am having difficulty in pin pointing something which I wanna rant about today. Hmmm ouh well, screw it! Let's not talk about stuffs which can be pretty much emotional tiring shall we? Like my previous post. Bahhhh. It was sucha drag in typing that out ok. No easy feat. Blogging isn't as easy as most people think it is. In actual fact, bloggers need to think on things to talk about. Find words to play around with, so that the content of his blog doesn't cause people to go on and read halfway and click the close button on the browser. I myself ain't sure if my blog is one of those blogs naggy and boring one. I mean, I barely post pictures nowadays. I don't know why. It is like a hassle of some sort...but then again, I guess those who wanna see pictures, can do so via my facebook account. The link to my profile is on ur left hand side of the screen. Add me and hollaaaaa, you can a trillion loads of images. Runs thru to 2009 January. Hahahha! It has been awhile since I last saw gf on cam. I miss those crazy sessions. Hmmm..ok ok fine. I better not mushy and whiny right now. I got approached by some people saying how mushy or in malay, jiwang, I am. But do you blame me for being the way I am? C'mon...I was out of the whole love spectrum for almost 4 years. I've done dates but none did enough to seal the word love within me. Some did came close and then the flame died off at the crucial moment. I guess I am a pretty hard boy to please huh? Go ask bestie Lily. Amongst the women in my life, I believed that she's one of those who knows me best. I don't fall for looks. You can be an hourglass figure supermodel with awesome tits pouring out of your top but I ain't budging when it comes to love. Ahuh. I don't roll that direction madam. Some other boys might work, but I guessed I am a totally different breed. Praising myself isn't something I like to do. And neither am I praising myself right now. I'm simply highlighting simple facts. When it comes to love, so much more matters. Not only the appearance. Really. That is how I see love. Cause love to me isn't just a word. It is almost as close as a divine feeling. Something pure and something wordless to describe. With that being said, it is a pretty sad case where you see love being strewn around cheaply nowadays. Not only with the new generation, but also the old. The new registration is coming this close to being deemed hopeless by me when it comes to love. Why is that so? Cause MOST of the time, girls measures the boy's love thru transport, monetary & appearance means while the boys measures a girl's love thru' how far would they go to satisfy the boy's need for lust. As crude as it may sound, that is how things is in these new generation. Sex no longer seems to be a holy act. It is more to hobby right now. And that certainly scares the shit out of me ok. Cause somewhere in the future, I know I would have a daughter. Geez...scary ok. It is pretty much 10 minutes before the start of a weekend. But who cares? I don't. Cause I'm working on a freaking weekend! I don't like working weekends ok. It bums the helloutof me. Sheeesh! Unless it's photography, I don't mind. Anything else, I tak suke! Hmph! Okay, I am done. Off to bed. Have a great weekend lovelies!! xoxo, AJ Thank you so much for reading you all. And since you are already down here, PLEASE VOTE for who do you prefer to listen to for next month. Aite?? Mucho loves! Monday, February 22, 2010 @ 11:47 PM
Third Party Issues Okay before I decides to whip up Maggie Curry, I'm gonna squeeze in an entry. Bear with me okay as I might get cranky along the way. Or suddenly end everything in an abrupt manner. It has been like this for years for me. I love my blog entries. Be it crappy or full with useless information or simply out to diss the entire galaxy, I still love blogging. Come to think of it, I've been blogging since I was in poly and that was about a good 6 7 years? Wow...and I am still actively writing. Bravo to me! Love hasn't been kind to me for the past 4 years. I am trying hard to not to whine thru' those 48 months but it was very tortorous ok. It tortures the damn soul and self-esteem thank you very much. It drove me to the point on the thought of being gay, GOD forgive this sin of mine. Very emotion F-ed up I tell ya. But as of late, things has been looking up. After years of not feeling of a woman's lips on my lips, I get one. A very beautiful yet surreal and super duper extraordinary woman. You can say we go way back. Up to 7 years ago? But that would be another story altogether which I would definitely share one day, insyallah. Being in love is so great and all but it will definitely leave you vulnerable to heartbreaks, unnecessary worries, arguments and plenty of chances to cry over something. That's the catch for having the best feeling in the world. You tend to be weak and your happiness is no longer controlled by you. But like it or not, that's the order of life right. Third party. That's the thing I am driving at tonight. It has been the case of most breakups that we are aware of. Two person in love and then up comes another person, declares an interest in one of them and then woo him/her and literally shakes the stability of the love structure of the couple. If the couple is strong enough and have that faith and trust that they built during their relationship, they will survive the whole saga. But what happens when one of them crumbles?? We both know how lethal is that blow... I have been thru' my fair share of third parties. And lemme emphasize this point ok. IT IS NOT FUN. NOT FUN to be at the receiving end of the stick. The way that blow comes to you when your other half's loyalty swayed towards the direction of the third party is really intense and immensely painful. I may have recovered from the wounds of yesterday but the scars are there. Memories of it all are like archived and when retrieved....damn it is like opening a huge cans of worms. So why do couples at times FAIL to overcome third party and why does third party choose to disrupt a beautiful relationship?? There are a million answers to both questions. Really. There isn't any wrong or right answer but it all boils down to how strong is the relationship between the initial couple.. I am actually getting sick of typing "third party"....so I'll just use the initials, TP. Does an individual leave a person whom they fell in love in the first place for the TP? Obviously the main cliche reason would be the TP is a better match. Maybe the TP is better looking, more financially secure, knows how to soften up someone's heart, etc. So in that sense, does one keep looking out for a better candidate thru' life?? And why does one can't stay true to that first person he/she starts a journey with. It is really a very complicated matter to think about but in real cold hard fact, things are pretty simple. It is either you love someone and stay loyal, or you love someone temporarily before moving on (like doing a temporary job while looking for a permanent job) or do you simply bring the person on a wild goose chase only to drop him like a piece of rock? Go figure... Whatever it is, TP issues never ends well for at LEAST one of them. One of them is sure hell gonna get hurt. His/Her course of life is gonna be altered forever, no doubt about that. I wished for TP issues to be non a existence fact in life. But we all know that that is imposibble. My true advice would be, when you love someone, please really do love them. And if you are a million percent deadly sure that the person you are with is your partner for life...please swipe away all TP which comes swooping by. We all know that when TP initiates and we don't react to any of their movements or lead them on, nothing would happen and everything would be fine. Think about this ok. I'm really hungry now. Food and then sleep. Work tomorrow. Sucks big time. But I got no choice. Have to work. Else I can't get engage and marry my beautiful girlfriend. LOL! Have a good night sleep lovelies!! xoxoxo, AJ Thank you so much for reading you all. And since you are already down here, PLEASE VOTE for who do you prefer to listen to for next month. Aite?? Mucho loves! Thursday, February 18, 2010 @ 9:15 PM
Fever Pitch I hate having fever. Obviously known to those around me, I am not known to be someone who gets sick easily. Nope I don't. Last time I was seriously sick was June 2009. Yeahh I can remember that. It was terrible. It was nearly a week of pain for me. The thing is when it happens, it will happen real bad. Up to the point where, I would lay in bed, too weak to move, can't eat, keep vomitting and I'll be drifting in and out of consciousness. Yikes! And right now, I am feeling I am at the start of it all. The whole vicious cycle, but I am TRYING to fight it off. Get myself out there in the sun. I need the sunlight, the heat to maybe strengthen me up. That has been the magic touch for my case if normal medicine seems to not work. Don't ask me why, but it just works. I am a warm blooded person. Even in cold conditions, my body produce this heat which people say is so warm. Everytime they shake my hand they say my touch is warm. And seeing how much I love being under the sun...I don't see why I should not have that warmth. It is quite a mystical kinda thing. As though some divine intervention between myself and the sun, the communication between my body and the rays. It does play a part in my life. If things doesn't get well for me, I'll basked under the sun. I do not want to wait to the point where I can't move ya see. Haish. I don't miss work but I do miss the friends at work. Laughing and lepak-ing with them. Damn! Being home on a day when sayang is around, that's fine. But being home when sayang is away at work...now that is NOT fine. Urgh. I would be home. Sleeping and let's say I am recovering, I will be damn bored. Geez. But if things doesn't go well tomorrow, I better stay indoors and see a doctor. Sheeesh! Well, I better take my medicine and sleep. The head is starting to thump on its own. Bleurgh! Have a good friday peeps! xoxo, AJ Thank you so much for reading you all. And since you are already down here, PLEASE VOTE for who do you prefer to listen to for next month. Aite?? Mucho loves! Saturday, February 13, 2010 @ 8:25 PM
Love Stone Wilt I miss blogging on a daily basis. Ya know when you come home from work and there is simply sooooo many things to ramble about. But I have found myself wanting. I feel lazy and whatever I wanna say just seem so unimportant. Really. Which begs me to ask myself...am I living a life where I am just like a zombie?? Like nothing out there is affecting me. Well maybe there is...but not THAT many. Hmmmm. I am right now, forcing myself to type this. Squeezing the juice out of my brain making it tick. It seems that I only ticked when cinta is around. Hmmm. Her presence kinda like simply ignite the switch in my body to ON mode. Geez. This is what happen when I am in love. I tend to always be all about the lover. Yeahhhh. I do not know if it is a bad or a good thing. But what I do know is, I am on auto mode. I am doing things naturally. Making decisions when it comes to love, seems so much easy and direct. I admit, love changes me. Love makes me a private person. Makes me mellow, emotional and very tender and loving BUT at the same time, very vulnerable. To whatever that is out there out to put me down. Even love made the once immortal Ummar looks like a fragile 80 year old who needs his walking stick. Jyeahhh. And we thought we were like the most sexiest alpha male ever. Sharks! He is on a pms mode all because of not getting somesome from his beau while I am on a withdrawal symtom disease because I need the hugs and smooches of my babylove. Nyehhh. Why have the mighty boys now turn mellow?? Bahhhh... But all is not fail. Mellow as we may be, we are still our sexy love for our beaus. The alpha male in their life. The man who stucked his head into the fire and claimed that the heat feel like coolness of the ice from alaska. Hahahhahaha! If you are reading this babylove, I am soooooo missing you. Very very much! Wo ai ni! Mmmmmuuahhh! Come home soon into my arms. Your head can lay on this space beween my neck and chest, anytime. Heee. I better get something to eat. So damn bloody hungry sey. Grrr. I am gonna be in cranky mode if I don't eat. Have a long weekend peeps! And to all my chinese friends.....HAPPY NEW YEAR!! xoxo&xo, AJ Thank you so much for reading you all. And since you are already down here, PLEASE VOTE for who do you prefer to listen to for next month. Aite?? Mucho loves! Monday, February 8, 2010 @ 11:52 AM
Religion Hey...hi everyone! How have all of you been doing so far? Great? Well I hope so. I hope that you are in the right frame of mind today. Really. I need that from you for the next 15 minutes as I am touching on one of the most sensitive and controversial aspect of life; religion. Define religion. Well dictionary.com says that religion is a set of beliefs concerning the cause, nature, and purpose of the universe, esp. when considered as the creation of a superhuman agency or agencies, usually involving devotional and ritual observances, and often containing a moral code governing the conduct of human affairs. There's plenty of where that came from. You can click HERE if you want to read more. With that being said, how does religion affect our life? Let us look from a point of relationship. I am sure there are plenty of people around the world who fell in love with one another but they come from a different religious background. Yes? No doubt about that. AND if they want to be with one another, one of them need to sacrifice his/her religion and goes into the partner's religion. Just so they could be together with the blessings from at least ONE side of the family. Now...the question is this. Religion is supposed to bring a family together, but what happens when it breaks a family apart? Or force seperation between lovers? Can we bluntly then sums up everything in one phrase like "it's not meant to be."? It is pretty much a weak phrase if you asked me. But then again, what can we say? We as human are not as strong as we think we are. Yes, compared among the other humans, some of us are emotionally, physically and mentally strong. But generally....we are weak. As humans, we have flaws. We make mistakes. We bleed, we grow old, we die. We ain't immortal. We NEED air, we NEED water to survive. If we need something to even live, shouldn't that something we need be more stronger than us? Therefore, my conclusion? We are weak. Okay back to religion. How much sacrifice does it makes us endure? For example a muslim lady who wants to marry a christian man. Now you tell me, who should be the one doing the converting? If you asked me, I would say the christian man. Why? Cause Islam is the one religion that is right. Now you throw this question to a christian, he/she would say that christianity is the right one. So it is back to the whole tug of war situation where both religion starts to fight one another, trying to up one another. IF the christian man embraces Islam, there is without a shadow of a doubt, he will lose almost everything in his life. I can assure you that. Why? Cause I have seen it happen right before my very eyes. He lost his friends, his family, basically everything. From a social kinda guy he became a loner with only his wife as a companion. Now this doesn't only happen when a christian embrace islam. It is also the other way round. Per say a muslim embrace christianity, he/she would lose everything too. So what now? Where do these lovers go? Yeahhh...off the top of my mind, the word seperation drops in. It is one of those sad thing in life. Let me give you another scenario...what if a couple starts off with the same religion and along the way, one of them decides to convert? You go think about that. And this couple pretty much have marriage on the horizon. Should they call it off? Of course if you ask them they would say no and simply said they do not mind. BUT that is not how things work out in life. Basically that's the way thing has been and forever they will stay till the end of time. It is either the other stay in the religion, keep the faith and live happily ever after or the other latter follows into conversion and both of them lose family friends and everything around them. Losing friends is pretty much something which you can replace I guess? Cause you can make new one. But family? Now...there isn't sucha thing as making new mom dad siblings ok. Are we willing to go thru' that loss? Losing a family member is losing part or even I dare say....losing your ownself. Family is like your arms, head, legs, parts of your body. Even in families you have mistakes. Maybe like an abusive parent. But at the end of the day, they are still FAMILY. And these mistakes are represented by scars. You chop of one of the torso...life would never be the same again; you are a handicapped. But what drives one to the point of conversion? Hmmm...there is a million and one things running across my mind but I chose not to choose one. I would rather generalise. Okay, so let us say a christian converts to a muslim because he/she thinks that Jesus isn't answering his prayers. Then he converts into a muslim and he felt good for awhile. And then things happens. Like his lover left him. Family left him. Friends left him. Would he then turn his back and blame ALLAH S.W.T then? All of a sudden there's this immense loneliness. This can also happen the other way round. Say a muslim converts to christian. Heh. So a christian god can't help u, u go to muslim god. And then to hindu god? To buddhist god? Religion isn't like a clinic where you can see different doctors ya know... All I can say is this. Everything is in your mind my friends. I am a muslim. I won't say I am a good one. But I was brought up by mom and dad and I have undergone challenges in life which made me question GOD existence. Subahannallah. I have hemiplegia and everytime I pray I asked why am I being brought into this world with this condition. And when I think of that, I think about the more unfortunate people around me. There is more people who have a worse scenario than me but yet still thank GOD for giving life to him. So I took it upon me and change my mind to look things from more than one perspective. Our parents brought us up on the religion they believe in. And it is up to us and our mind to believe in it. Everyone has their own take....I can accept that. But never use the problems you face as a driving force when you are thinking of conversion. It is all in the mind my friends. All in the mind. If we have the mindset that we can do something about our problem, insyallah you can. Well that is my take on religious issues. It has been at the back of my head for the last couple of nights. I just thought of penning them down, and let the feelings out. No intended harm to anyone or any religion. Have a blessed day people! xoxo&xo, AJ Thank you so much for reading you all. And since you are already down here, PLEASE VOTE for who do you prefer to listen to for next month. Aite?? Mucho loves! Sunday, February 7, 2010 @ 4:01 PM
My Lady Almost a week has passed. Hmmm so many things has happened. Happy sad confusion doubts. You named it. It seems like emotions really likes playing around with me. I don't know why. Probably because I am the sort of person who gives more than he takes. Yeahh. Maybe. At times, I don't think about myself and just proceed with actions that my heart told me to do. And one thing that my heart always says is to think about the smiles of others. Cause you made other smile, one day others or maybe just one, will make me smile. I've been stucked with this personality. Friends who have known me more than a decade like, Andi, Ummar and Nas...they know what I am talking about. I've been having images during my sleep. They all put up a story. Of a girl and me...destined to be with one another. But that destiny was bounded and decorated with thorns, landmines, traps and challenges that tested every ounce of your sanity beliefs and will to survive. And in this dream, she along with me...conquered our fears and dare to dream. I am in a relationship where the curve in a graph is immensely steep but somehow, I am finding the strength from somewhere to simply continue climbing. I don't know how but I am doing it. Really. On certain girls, I will probably have packed up my bags and leave...but not this one. I would really love to share but...I want to keep things discreet. She wants it to be, so do I. We don't like attention focused on us. It's suffocating. Wouldn't it be nice to simply be in a place where no one knows you? Or when we walked on streets, you don't get text messages saying "I saw you with....". It is nice that people knows you but at times....well you know what I meant. I get very protective over my girl. I can't help it. That's the way I have and always will be. When guys swooped around her like vultures, I would be like this jaguar who is protecting his prey. And when I say prey, I am not referring to her in a bad way ok. A jaguar protects his prey. So I am like this protector. It's a natural order that jealousy feeling starts to creep in. Unknowingly it will forced your hand into doing something utterly ridiculous or stupid. And because of that action, the jag might lose the prey to the swooning vultures. I'm hoping that my past experience can teach me to be a better person, boyfriend and not be a typical one. Insyallah. I have faith and trust in her. =) It's raining heavily and I think I prolly sleep in. Take a nap and maybe go out for awhile. I don't know. Honey gotta work and I get bored when she is working and I am not doing anything. Geeez! Ouh well, we'll see. Have an awesome Sunday peepos!! xoxoxo&XO, AJ Thank you so much for reading you all. And since you are already down here, PLEASE VOTE for who do you prefer to listen to for next month. Aite?? Mucho loves! Monday, February 1, 2010 @ 8:33 AM
Red Devils, New Life ![]() Hehehehe! I really need to do this. It certainly felt amazing to be winning THIS kind of matches. Who cares when you are a stature of Manchester United and won against the likes of Hull and Wolves. Those can be done day in, day out. But when the big four type of matches, hoho....winning is a totally everything. Especially pride and a statement of intent, to be champions four years on a trot. Now that the dust has settled and the gunners along with their fans are licking their wounds of war with the REDS Army, they better reload quick. Cause they need more than luck and skills to bypass the damn blue machine called Chelsea. And it's not gonna be easy, as Stamford Bridge is a fortress. I don't need to go thru' the blues records ya see...cause they losing there is like wishing for snow to happen in sunny Singapore. Gonna take a darn miracle. BUT with that being said, miracle do happens and dreams DO come true, I am totally behind the gunners for this one. Just so that the red devils can beat Pompey and claim back our throne position. On a side note, it is already a February people!! How nice, is it...to start a new month with an off day huh? Hehehehe! Yeap yeap! This month I will be doin' the Tuesday-Saturday shift, and I like it. Nevermind about the Saturday working day, work ends at 6pm, I still have time to go out and play. Hehehe! I got a feeling that this month is gonna be a tad special... I am in a phase of life where everything is coming together. Piece by piece of the puzzle is forming into a very perfect and beautiful picture. I don't wanna jinx it by saying anything more but it does have got to do with love, and a future family. I am also on course on my dream quest to be a photographer. And I am glad that I have the support from the people that I love. Hehe! I am almost happy now. I truly wish my 4 years of torment would be over and the slate would be wipe clean; making way for a new lease of life. I need to go make breakfast now. I'm having in mind some hotdog sandwiches. Heh. Probably head to the library or something, need to read up on some photography thingy. Kekekeke! Have an awesome monday ok peeeps! Stay out of trouble but remain classy. xoxoxo&XO, AJ Thank you so much for reading you all. And since you are already down here, PLEASE VOTE for who do you prefer to listen to for next month. Aite?? Mucho loves! |